Waving the White Flag

My prayer life is not perfect. Although, I do make every attempt to be intentional when I pray. Most of the time my prayers are for others and rarely for myself. I think this comes from me being a caring but a very stubborn and independent person as well. I have always struggled to ask for help and my prayer life certainly reflects that fact about me.

I am currently 46 years old. Most men my age and older were raised to be providers, protectors, and to suppress our emotions. My issue was that I did not go to God and ask for his help with my stress. As men we can tend to bottle up our stress as a method to “protect” those we hold dear to us. All the while, we can be causing unhealthy physical and mental impacts to our bodies that manifest in all sorts of ways.

For me, I could not find rest. I would go to bed and quickly fall asleep. However, my sleep was very light and I would wake up numerous times a night. I often found myself tossing, turning, and flipping my pillow over dozens of times and waking my wife up in the process. I would end up on the couch so that my wife could sleep. Each time I would wake up the stressors filled my thoughts and they prohibited me from going back to sleep. I found myself not being mentally present for my family because every ounce of energy was pouring into my work. I thought focusing the little energy I had should to my job because providing was somehow more important. My entire approach to the issue was wrong.

After four years of fighting on my own, I broke down in complete exhausted submission. My white flag went up and I asked God for help. What he did is a story for another time. What I will tell you is that I found the beginning to my answer in God’s word, then I found rest.

“Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.”

Philippians 4:6

Joe Brooks
A Man IN Action