First he started telling me what to wear to work. Looking back, it seemed such a long way from becoming an emergency.
But it became just that.
I didn’t really mind the clothing thing because he always looked great and had a much better sense of fashion than I did. But then he started interrogating me about who I had lunch with and which men in the office talked to me. It was as though he had made me look better then was jealous of every male who could see me.
And it just got worse. If I worked late, he texted me 20 times to find out where I was and what I was doing. He started yelling at me for no reason, throwing things and then shoving me.
When he hit me the first time, I left for the whole day. He said he was really sorry, but it didn’t last long. His behavior got even worse. I was afraid to say or do anything for fear of making him angry.
One day, he showed up at my office. The receptionist was taking too long to find me, so he started down one of the halls himself. When he found me, I was in the breakroom – unfortunately, with two male colleagues.
My boyfriend went ballistic. He punched one of the guys while I tried to pull him off. The other man yelled for someone to call building security, but my boyfriend stormed out before they got there.
I was shaking, stunned … and terrified. I blurted out that he’d hit me before. A work friend offered to let me stay with her that night, but I didn’t want to put her family in any danger. Everyone thought I should call the police, even though the guy who got punched said he wouldn’t press charges, for my sake.
There was no way I was calling the police. What would they do? He hadn’t hit me this time. I couldn’t prove I was in danger and I shudder to think what he would’ve done after they left.
That’s when someone said, “Talk to Sheltering Wings. They have a helpline.”
I knew about Sheltering Wings, but never in my life did I ever think I’d have to call them. I did call, though, because I didn’t know what else to do.
They went into crisis mode! They said, “We have a place for you. Come straight here.” I can’t tell you how relieved I felt.
I stayed for a few months, until I could figure out how I’d gotten into this mess (and find an apartment with a security gate). I learned a lot about how healthy relationships are supposed to be.
I’d encourage anyone in a similar emergency to call the Sheltering Wings hotline. They are here to help you in your emergency.
24-HOUR HELPLINE (317) 745-1496
