In order to prevent domestic abuse – or to escape it when it happens – it’s vital to have a clear understanding of what a healthy relationship is not and what it is.
One in four women and one in seven men will experience some form of intimate partner violence. Because of the prevalence of domestic violence, many people unquestioningly accept foul and abusive behavior as normal. They are neither equipped nor prepared to expect and demand to experience the characteristics of healthy relationships.
The Power & Control and Equality wheels illustrate features of unhealthy and healthy relationships.
Power & Control Wheel
All abusive behavior is designed to allow an abuser to achieve and maintain power and control. This wheel is helpful for understanding the overall pattern of abusive and violent behaviors, which are used by a batterer to establish and maintain control over his partner.
Equality Wheel
This tool illustrates the dynamics of a healthy relationship in which two people respect and submit to one another in love. This type of relationship is characterized by kindness, strong communication, healthy boundaries, shared values, intimacy, vulnerability and respect.
Compare healthy and unhealthy relationships
Using the image below, drag the slider to the left and right to compare the characteristics of healthy and unhealthy relationships.
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Power & Control Wheel | Equality Wheel
Courtesy of
Domestic Abuse Intervention Programs and the
National Center on Domestic and Sexual Violence
No one deserves to be abused. Ever.
If you’re in immediate danger, call 911. If you think you might be experiencing physical, emotional, electronic/online, spiritual, sexual or financial violence, you can explore our website to learn more. Or, simply call our 24/7 helpline at (317) 745-1496 and a trained advocate will answer your call.
If you believe a friend, family member, coworker, church member or anyone else you know might be experiencing abuse, you can also contact our 24/7 helpline and we’ll help you respond appropriately.
No matter the abuser, no matter the type of abuse, the thirst for power and control is always at the root.
