One cannot read Scripture and be unaware of the responsibilities of a husband and a father. Old and New Testaments recount the need for strong men to shoulder this task. I once saw a plaque that read:
WHEREVER DAD SITS
is
THE HEAD OF THE TABLE
All too often, this is misinterpreted – especially in our culture. However, the image is not of a mighty ruler sitting on a throne, ordering around his subjects. The image is more like the conductor of a symphony. The conductor knows the score, the strengths of each artist in the orchestra and sets a tempo. But it is the talent and passion of the musicians that creates the music we enjoy. The conductor is careful but definite, powerful because he is subdued. Our families look to us as husbands and fathers to be the ones who say, “Have no fear! Your leader is here!”
Let’s face it. Emotionally, most men are much more temperamental than women. (It’s the whole Mars-Venus thing.) It is easy for us to believe that if everything is all right at this moment then it’s got to be fine tomorrow. So, we don’t worry. Conversely, our wives and daughters are more likely to judge what is happening now by the effect they sense or perceive it may have in the days (and years) ahead. They may wonder why we don’t have the same kind of concern or why we can’t see what they see.
”Don't ever forget that the kind of authority we're talking about here is the authority of love. It seems to me that nearly every woman wants a man who knows how to love with authority!
Charles Shedd“Letters to Philip”
Another way we can picture our role is as the captain of a ship. We must learn to keep our eyes on the North Star, to read the currents, to assess the morale of the crew, to care for the ship, to be mindful of the weather and to guide our families toward the horizon. Many homes suffer because they are steered, not guided. Or, they are led by abusive or neglectful captains. Our wives and children admire us most when we acknowledge our role and when we begin to take responsibility for the voyage.
We can observe evidence all around us that many children are missing wise, kind fathers and that many wives are missing strong, selfless husbands. Up and down the block, and all around us, there are too many homes in which fathers have abdicated their leadership, instead choosing to focus on careers, hobbies or other secondary pursuits. This can cause things to come undone at home. Quickly.
Husbands and dads, you’re sitting at the head of the table. Don’t neglect or abuse the position you’ve been given. Take it seriously. Invest the best part of your heart and strength in the others seated at the table with you. Lead with the strength of self-sacrificial love.
By the way, check out John 13:1-17 to see what it should look like for us to sit at the head of the table.
Don Raymond
A Man IN Action
P.S. October is Domestic Violence Awareness and Prevention Month and you can play a part. Share some donuts, purchase some clothing or accessories, and like, comment upon, and share our social media posts. You can help us break the cycle!
Dine Out Against Domestic Violence
Say “NO” to domestic violence … by saying “YES” to donuts! Share a dozen purple donuts (or two!) on October 22 and help raise awareness.
#PurpleThursday
On October 22, wear purple around town, at school, at work and at home. Take pictures and share them on social media tagging @ShelteringWings and using #PurpleThursday.
SWag Shop
For every item you purchase, you’ll generate awareness of domestic violence and proceeds will help us support survivors and work to prevent domestic violence across the community.
